From the Blog

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2015-05-27

19 Ways For IT To Mess With Business Users

If you work in Information Technology, you’re under-appreciated and overworked. And I’m sure you’ve had the occasional glimmer of mischievous glee thinking about the ways you could mess with your business users à la Jim and Dwight from The Office. Here are 19 ways you could make business users’ lives miserable if you were feeling particularly vengeful:

  1. Force users to reset passwords with high-security requirements…daily.
  2. Tell line of business people that the integration work will take 3 months every time they want to onboard a new customer. 
  3. When they push back, tell them it’s because you can’t write a single new line of code for them until the Cubs win the World Series (sorry to put my finger in an open wound, fellow Chicagoans).
  4. Make the CEO’s printer default for all office computers.
  5. Add offensive words to users’ Microsoft Word auto-complete.
  6. Post everyone’s Instant Messaging conversations to a live feed under the guise of “promoting transparency.”
  7. Kick off the weekend early with an IT “review” of inappropriate websites visited by employees during the week….and publish the list in the company cafeteria.
  8. Compile a list of the Top 10 dumbest IT requests of the week — along with their requestors — and post the “winners” to the internal community. 
  9. Schedule an ERP maintenance for the middle of the workday in the middle of the workweek — 11 a.m. on Wednesday sounds about right.
  10. Play World of Warcraft every day during the 3 p.m. hour to slow network traffic down to a crawl.
  11. During this time, answer the helpdesk phone with, “Leeerooooy Jenkins!”
  12. Disallow e-mail attachments, disable flash drives, and block access to Dropbox & Google Drive… for “security purposes.”
  13. Move user’s desktop icons, take a screenshot, and set it as their wallpaper.
  14. Block the NCAA IP address during March Madness.
  15. Refuse to answer an easy IT question because “it’s time for one of your State-allocated breaks.”
  16. Put all vendors through 6-month corporate security reviews (even the ones who don’t come on-site, access applications, or need email addresses.)
  17. Only offer support to users in a certain geographical region based on YOUR local time zone.
  18. Change all computer sound effects to fart noises throughout the office.
  19. Change all internet homepages to an unclosable RickRoll.

Next time you feel like your business users are not showing you enough appreciation, inject a little anarchy into their day with one of these shenanigans. Just don’t tell anyone who gave you the idea…